This is my fellow – Dorada, a fish caught locally.

Method:
First visit the fish market where you will encounter creatures stranger than fiction -(the ladies serving you are very nice) – but what you want is that rather conservative looking fish that looks like a fish and not some monster of the deep.

Then you mime madly – Here I have an advantage, having learned general stage skills at Miss Pinchmead’s School for Young Ladies.
Not. More like the local reform school for me – ‘dumb insolence’ was how my adorable headmistress described my general attitude – I don’t know what she could have meant O-:

However, I digress – Now you signal wildly to indicate that you would like the strikingly attractive young Spanish girl to gut your fish.
She slugs out the innards, cuts the gills and flappers off – All of which should provoke more frantic signals from you
i.e. I need MORE than that. A LLOOTT MMOORREE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, she says, scaling frenetically – At which point, if you’ve any sense at all (hard luck for me) you stand back – or you will leave the fish market gleaming like… well, a fish. And don’t put your best suede purse down on the counter either as I did. (who’d have guessed) As that water you just lifted it out of is fish juice. Nice, huh?!

Off with it’s head! you mime with a dramatic slash across your throat – I don’t want that fishy eye staring at me as I tuck in

And now let’s get down to the real carnage – fillet it please – Take your own route to achieve this in translation – I favour the soundtrack method, followed by a slump as I indicate that my backbone has been removed (did I ever have any?)

Now you have two delicious looking fillets which you can put on the barbie, or, as I did, wrap in a loose foil parcel, having oiled the foil first – add some butter, rock salt and a scrabble of pepper, squeeze a lemon in your hands, catching the pips – no need for fancy juicers – add whatever fresh herbs you happen to have around, and now bung in a fairly hot oven for 15 minutes.

The result, ladies, is the most delicately flavoured white fish – watch out for any remaining bones – serve with crushed new potatoes slathered in butter and seasoned with black pepper, rock salt and herbs, and escalivada – more of which tomorrow

Escalivada – which the French call ratatouille – and I call delicious

Have a great day with plenty of delicious food to eat
Sxx